the knitting ref

Tuesday, February 07, 2006

No Fear

More and more I’m learning that fear had held me back from far too much. Fear of failure, fear of the unknown, fear of appearing foolish. And more and more I’m learning to just let go of the fear. The rewards are, more often than not, great.

This was brought home to me (yet again) today when I was working on Mariah’s second sleeve. A coworker commented on how talented I am that I can do cabling. I’m sorry but I don’t feel talented. I’m am, however, beginning to feel experienced, and that someday soon I can really call myself a knitter and not just a wannabe.

This is the first knitted garment I’ve done that has cabling; I was always too afraid to try it before now. How silly. Realistically what was the worst that could have happened? I’d have a tangled mess of yarn, and I’d move on to other things. And was is reality? I tried it on a swatch and found that, lo and behold, cabling is not rocket science.

Yes, at first I was very clumsy with the cabling needle; it took a couple of tries with a couple of different cable needles before I found one I was happy with. Both the swatch and the sleeve had to be frogged a few times before I got it right. But a little patience and perseverance, and I did it.

When I started the first sleeve, I got about 9 inches into the sleeve before I noticed that I had turned one of the cables the wrong way about 2 inches lower. At that point I was beginning to get frustrated because I had had to frog a number of times. I had read about and seen people tinking a small portion of an item and reknitting the section, but there was that fear again. Of what? That I might have to frog 2 inches of sleeve? Wasn’t that what I was going to have to do anyway? What did I have to lose?

And you know what, it worked. I tried it on my swatch first. And the first couple attempts looked and felt clumsy, but I soon picked up the process. What a timesaver!

I’ve got to start applying the same concept to other parts of my life. Yes, there will be failures, difficulties, and less-than-stellar results, but the successes—even more sweet because I stopped being afraid.

As I re-read yesterday’s post, it sounded so wimpy. I hope I haven’t bit off more than I can chew. That’s the "fear" talking. Instead of worrying about whether I can do it or not, I need to put some serious energy into actually trying to make the shawl that I so very much want and see how far I can get before I run into an insurmountable problem. The end result may surprise me.

No Fear


At 4:48 PM, Anonymous Christine said...

You are doing beautiful work on your Mariah cabling. I'm really impressed! I've never knit a sweater, probably out of fear just like you said. Thanks for reminding me that I shouldn't do that to myself!


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