the knitting ref

Wednesday, October 05, 2005

Today I am 45. Looking at that sentence is a bit surreal. If you had told me 3 years ago that I would be celebrating my 45th birthday, I would have thought you were on crack. 3 years ago today, I was sitting at home waiting to have surgery on the 8th, knowing that I was full of cancer. I was sitting there having just had almost 9 liters of fluid tapped from my abdomen. Losing 12 pounds was great for more reasons than the obvious, but I wouldn’t recommend it as a weight loss tool.

And so am I going out tonight and partying like it’s 1999? Nope. This day is pretty much going to be just a regular day. Several weeks ago when it became obvious that scheduling any big festivities was going to be pretty much impossible, I was feeling pretty bummed. But then, I realized that having a big celebration was irrelevant. And since then, I have been taking quiet satisfaction in just “being here.”

My schedule for today looks like this: I got up, fed the animals, got dressed and headed out the door for work. Before getting to work, I had to stop in at the lab to have my blood drawn. I came into work where I found lovely gifties from some of my co-workers (I’ll post pictures later), and plowed through the never-ending mass of paperwork that makes its way to my desk on a continual basis. I’m leaving early to go to my oncologist’s appointment where the news is likely to be so-so at best (I’m not willing to think that negatively today). After the appointment, I’m going home to sit quietly and knit until it’s going to go out to dinner with the Hubster and my parents. (Both kids have to work today.) After that, we’ll probably head home and fall asleep in front of the T.V. (a nightly ritual at Casa Valdez).

And that is all more than o.k. It’s actually sounding pretty close to perfect.

Thank you God, for giving me another day to spend with those who are most important to me and who make life worth living. Thank You for providing the opportunity to have a job that I find fulfilling, and directing me to the wonderful doctors who have kept me on this earth. And, of course, Thank You for having the foresight to have created knitting (I don’t know where I’d be without it). I am truly blessed.


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